On Sunday, my little one turns two. I'm not stunned like I was when Bella turned two. Lia is chatty and headstrong and chubby and seems very two, to me. When Bella was two, Two seemed like an unbelievably large, grown up number. I might as well send her to college next year.
Now thinking of Five takes the wind out of me, and two seems like a drop in the bucket of babyhood. Plus it helps that when Bella was two, I was getting ready in my mind for her to be a big sister in a matter of weeks. When she was two, there was a little marshmallow of a baby hanging out with us, always making Bella's age seem like the new grown-up.
It's very strange having a two-year-old and no baby on the way to alter perspective. Two is still my squishy, snuggly, nursing baby. Whether there will be another two year old in our family some day, I don't know. It seems to make it easier enjoy today if we leave that possibility open. Then I don't panic at every little event, thinking, This is the last second birthday we get to celebrate! This is the last time someone in our family is two years, two months, and a day and a half old! There goes another minute of the Last of the Babyhood. MUST. ENJOY. ENJOY HARDER. NOW!!
And still, there are the days when I hope I am paying close enough attention, getting in enough cuddles. No mom wants to regret passing on just one more cuddle while time relentlessly marches on.
Last year's birthday already seems so far away that I barely remember that chubby face. It won't be long before this new grown up face looks like a baby. So snuggle, I do.
Happy birthday, little one. I will get back in the habit of jotting down some of your favorite things and funny quirks, so that in a few years I can use them as bait to get you to sit and snuggle with me while we giggle over your baby days. For now, I must end this and go stock up on the last of my one-year-old snuggles. I love you!
